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Friday, November 2, 2007

Commercials. Bad Commercials.

Some commercials just should be outlawed. This is my blog and this is my opinion. For years, we didn't have any commercials about uh....certain things. You know which things I am talking about. But. Now. Now they are showing Vi*gra commercials. Dozens of them, interspersed with L*vitra commercials...among other things. They are all basically the same. A man, a rugged man, far more manly than most men, openly acknowledges that he had problems with his rig. But then he took a pill, and ZING, he can perform again! He can play professional baseball!! He can (wink, wink) throw a football through a tire! You try to ignore these commercials. You tell yourself you do not need this product. But. Then you remember all those nights when, after a long day, you went to bed, and your wife wanted to - in fact practically begged you to - throw the football through the tire. But you were too tired. So now, on the sofa, you are a husk of your former self, a man with a tiny shriveled Camry, wondering if you should maybe just ask your doctor about Vi*gra. But. That would mean going to the doctor's office. Which, in your imagination has a GIANT neon sign outside that reads: VI*GRA DOCTOR, PROVIDING VI*GRA FOR GUYS WHO NEED VI*GRA. Dave Barry just rocks. The guy just rocks!!

15 comments:

laurie said...

"a man with a shriveled camry.." funny.

the weirdest of those commercials is the one where the man and the woman are sitting side by side in bathtubs on a hillside, holding hands.

i just don't get it....

Kellan said...

Those commercials are crazy! It makes you wonder what will be next - who would have ever thought that this was a problems and then that there would be a pill for it and then that it would have a commercial on TV, one day. Who would have ever thought? It is crazy! This was so funny - funny! See ya.

Brenda said...

And they've even got initials for the "problem" these pills correct, ED.

The very worst commercials are the "Happy Period" ones. Makes you want to throw your tampons and maxi-pads at the TV!

Beckie said...

Those commercial drive me crazy...they are on all of the sports channels that my 7 year old son likes to watch.

fiwa said...

Oh, I know just what you mean. Way too much information on commercials these days - TMI!

WorksForMom said...

I totally agree. One certain way to kill a commerical is via OVERPLAY. WHY do they do it? I don't get it!

Tiggerlane said...

All the drug commercials get to me...and I love the ones about peeing troubles. And sleeping troubles. I just want to smash that green moth into oblivion!

Frances said...

Well-said my dear.
You know what commercials make me nuts?
The medication ones. A drop dead sexy voice starts telling you that you might get liver damage or have a heart attack from the stuff, and while the sexy voice is telling you that two people are walking down a beach holding hands.
Take care,
Frances

dawn said...

Very funny and it is true. I love the expressions Dave Barry uses for different things. I really enjoyed this post, and I do agree with you about the commercials. We don't have as many of them up in Canada, but we watch stations from Washington, and see lots of the commercials from there. Frankly, there are more and more as the hour gets later, I am sure just the commercials alone can create performance anxiety.

coffespaz said...

I have to agree. What gets me is that rapid play list of side effects and "you shouldn't take this if..." disclaimers at the end. Its bad enough that they have them, do they have to sound like car commercials too??

Cazzie!!! said...

Hahahaha, the camry comment got me laughung!! The ads I hate atm are the mint candy ones we have here. It shows a guy walking along through a crowd of people, at the market and at the beach with these massively long pointy nipples...because the mint is so cool it makes them stand to attention. Bloody rediculous I reckon!! LMAO. Still, it is memorable I guess, and thats the point of this bad taste marketing eh?

Sandy said...

"your wife wanted to - in fact practically begged you to - throw the football through the tire." Thanks for THAT picture in my head...lol.

Sirdar said...

Also those feminine hygiene commercials are getting quite..uh...interesting too. Fortunately, I don't need to go see the doctor about the little blue pill...but with the power of advertising, I now know where to go should I ever need help. :-)

Joy T. said...

Ok sorry, I read "has problem with his rig" and fell over laughing LOLOLOL

Debs said...

Problem with his Rig had me giggling too.