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Monday, November 26, 2007

Ever Wish You ...

were an Only Sibling????? Families....ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! Makes me crazy sometimes. I have two sisters and am Always in the Middle. Nothing new...I always have been. My brother chooses not to get involved in the "stuff" that happens here as he lives a day's drive away. Sometimes I wish I lived MORE than a day's drive away... I know that these are the holidays and I have ten million things to get ready for Christmas. And my dad is in the hospital. And they don't want him to go home. They want him to go to a rehab facility as he will be in a back brace for some time. His house has stairs. Lots of stairs. He can't really dress himself and take care of himself right now. That's the reason his Dr. wants him to go to a facility where they can help him. They have to wait for the vertebrae in his back to heal some before he can even start walking. He is in an awful lot of pain. Oh, and did I mention that he is eighty years old?? Doesn't always make alot of sense. I'm not sure if it is the heavy painkillers....or old age / dementia....or probably a combination of the two. I'm amazed sometimes at what comes out of his mouth! And my younger sister gets away with everything. Just everything! I'm upset. Very upset with the state of affairs right now.

Tried to go out and do some Christmas shopping this afternoon. It's REALLY hard to do that when you are as pissed off as I was. Or am. Yes, I still am. I can't get in to all of the specifics. But there are alot of reasons why I wish I was an only child on some days.

But, then again, I feel bad that my daughter will have to deal with me all by herself. And, if I am eighty, I probably will be kinda mean and kinda loony or shall I say bitchy. I will keep repeating to myself....this too shall pass...this too shall pass...

13 comments:

Willowtree said...

I sort of am an only child (even though I have two siblings), I was raised largely separate from my two brothers and haven't spoken to either of them in years.

laurie said...

ah, your poor dad. can he not live on ground level of his house, at least for a while? move a bed downstairs?

i know when my dad was dying we all had different ideas of how to take care of him. and there are a *lot* of us. it was not easy.

i feel for you.

Sandy said...

It must be scary for your dad having to be away from his "stuff", especially during the holidays.

Must be scary for you having your dad be sick.

Y'all are in my prayers!

PS: I'm in the WT camp, 3 siblings, none of whom have had anything to do with me in YEARS!

jakelliesmom said...

Most people assume I'm an only child as I never, ever mention my brother.

I'm sorry for the struggles with your dad. I hope you all can find a hopeful solution.

fiwa said...

Big hugs to you. I completely understand. I am always caught in the middle between my 3 sisters, and my brother stays out of it too.
Rehab sounds like a good option for him, he'll need a lot of care if he's in that much pain - poor guy. As far as the crazy things that are coming out of his mouth - sometimes that's a combination of pain meds and being in a new place. My dad did that several times while he was in the hospital, but as soon as he was back out and in a familiar place he stopped.

Anyway - I hope you can find some peace and distance from the drama your siblings are creating.

Don't forget to take care of you.
lovins,
fiwa

Kellan said...

My father was an only child and my mother came from 8 children - I have two siblings - I am close to my sister and brother, but we too .... sometimes have our issues. Go shopping - that'll help, I hope. See you soon.

Debs said...

I feel your pain.

Sending positive vibes your way. ;)

Donna said...

Trust me, it passes too quickly...wish my Mom & Dad were here just to Hear me gripe!!! I was 45 when Mom crossed and 52 when we lost Dad. I had the same feeling you do about my sister. I finally realised that it was better to let it go...I did and it is...for whatever help this brings you, I hope you can find some peace about it all. My sister and I are great friends.

WorksForMom said...

You are RIGHT. This too shall pass. In time. I am so sorry you are dealing with this. Especially at this time of year. I know how you feel. I'm the youngest and we're always at odds about those decisions.

Please take care of yourself friend.

~ Ms. Cute Pants ~ said...

I often hear of conflict & competition when one has more than one sibling. My friend, 'Kate' is adamant that this is not a factor if you just have one sibling. Judging from your visitor comments & thinking back on families that I know with more that 2 children, I am begining to see what my friend Kate means. But you know you're not alone...

I can understand how hard it must be for you to have to deal with your fathers' situation. The Holiday Season is the most stressful time of year for many & I'm sure having to worry about your dad is not making it any easier. I hope for a speedy recovery for your father & that it turns out to be a good holiday for you and your family.

Joy T. said...

{{{Hugs}}} Jeanne!

lisa's chaos said...

I hope your dad is doing better. I am an only child, it sucks. I wish I had siblings to love or argue with. :)

Sirdar said...

Too bad about your dad...and the way things are with your siblings.

I have one sister that is 13 years older than me. She left home early and then she ran off with a neighbour after 20 years of marriage. Haven't seen her since.