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Saturday, January 26, 2008

Common Sense

My parents told me about Mr. Common Sense early in my life and told me I would do
well to call on him when making decisions. It seems he was always around in my
early years but less and less as time passed by until today I read his obituary. Please join me in a moment of silence in remembrance. For Common Sense had served us
all so well for so many generations.


Obituary
Common Sense

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been
with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records
were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when
to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you
earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they
themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Aspirin,sun lotion or a bandaid to a student; but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your
own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three stepbrothers;
I Know my Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm a Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

Author unknown

10 comments:

Pamela said...

D*mn that was good. Whoever wrote that was inspired.

sirdar said...

Common sense is something that is missing for many...sometimes even me :-)

Pam Aries said...

THat was pretty darn funny! Some people never even new him..! You asked me about my page back ground...what exactly do you mean... and guess what ,I don't knw what pyzam is! haha!

Marlee said...

Wow, that is *really* good--and SO TRUE!!

Simply Jenn said...

Aw man, I've been told I have no common sense, and that was BEFORE he died. I hope I didn't contribute.

Sandy said...

That was VERY good! But I heard that, like Mark Twain, the reports of C.S.'s death are greatly exaggerated. I think he is on vacation, or haitus if you will, hiding out in the midwest or south or somewhere like that.

I could be deluding myself, of course!

Nina said...

Good one. I love the bit about the bandaids and sun-lotion. Whee. I can't complain about anything though, since I have so little common sense myself.

Jen said...

i used to play with common sense daily, wondering why no one else found him to be the best playmate. what will i do now? ;)

Brenda said...

He still lives on here, I use my common sense every day. Most days it's the only sense I still have!

coloursofdawn said...

I love this piece. It makes so much sense every time I read it.